I went to a holiday business party this evening and sat with five people who didn’t have their significant other with them. It was a good time meeting people in different fields and sharing a few laughs. It also reminded me how people grapple with trying to get spouses to attend company parties.
Here’s my take: It’s good to encourage a spouse to attend a company holiday party – if and only if they bring a positive attitude with them. When you’re at a company function, your behavior matters.When you bring a spouse, so does theirs.
Attending company functions can strengthen relationships and conversations about the workplace. It’s an opportunity for spouses to put a face with names that you might mention, and it gives co-workers an opportunity to see another part of your life outside of the workplace.
At tonight’s function, most of the people at my table didn’t bring a significant other with them because it wasn’t convenient to meet them downtown on a Monday evening. Sometimes convenience isn’t the issue. It’s all about attitudes. If you’re battling with a spouse who really doesn’t want to attend a company holiday party, despite your urging, don’t push it. Remember, only you know your spouse.
Business etiquette expert Barbara Pachter once shared a story wiith me about how a compaany president used the company’s holiday party to thank employees for a great year. One spouse yelled out in a crowded room, “If everyone is so wonderful, why do yo pay them so little? Not good.
If a spouse begrudgingly accompanies you, or if you know there’s a chance an unfortunate incident could happen, why risk it?
Spouses at company holiday functions: Is it really necessary?
November 30th, 2009 | Posted in Kudos & Blunders | 1 Comment »Tags: attitudes, holiday parties, spouses
One Comment to “Spouses at company holiday functions: Is it really necessary?”
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Nice post, and nice site (it’s my first time visiting). I think you’re right on with your suggestion that spouses must be on their best behavior or not attend holiday parties at all.
One additional thought I had is that in small businesses — like, with 100 or fewer employees — it is often easier to get spouses to attend and for them to be on their best behavior because, if the company’s leadership is doing at least a decent job, they would have reached out to employees throughout the year with an overall message of, you are our family and so your family is our family as well. The nonprofit I work for runs an annual top small company workplaces competition, and this is a common theme among them, including for get-togethers at other times of the year (ie, 4th of July picnic). Doing a good job at this may seem squishy to leadership, but a little effort along these lines here and there can make a big difference on absenteeism, turnover, communication and productivity.